USB
Topic: Technology
I got a new phone.

I managed to upgrade my old phone and replaced it with a Nokia 6101. I like it. And now, all the cool things I see that I have to tell you I'm not exaggerating or making up, I'll be able to photograph and show you, because it's a camera phone.

The USB cord that allows the owner to connect it to the computer, however, costs 50 United States dollars. Why? It's a patch cable! You can buy a cable that hooks a device that's a printer, fax machine, scanner, and internet telephone to your computer, but a phone costs fifty? But they got you by the unmentionables, because you gotta have it... it's too cool to not have.

I paid a dollar for one on Ebay. Screw you, Nokia.

USB is used for everything nowadays. I gues that's why computer systems are getting more and more ports. Keyboards are now sporting USB hubs, and my computer itself has six ports. My printer has a port on it, and it's hooked up to Ghostwolf's computer, which has eight ports on its own, plus another port on the Zboard. I predict that, eventually, your mouse will have a USB port.*

I was talking to my friend Joe on the phone this morning, and I realized that if they just set up the whole world with USB instead of phone, electrical, and cable wiring to your house, and if all your appliances had USB cords instead of electrical ones, things would be a lot simpler. Sure, they'd need to carry more power, but they will. Oh, they will. Think of it: you buy a television set, come home, plug it into one of your wall USB outlets, and bam! You have cable and power, all in one connection, with only one wire. No need for a cable box, either.

After setting that up, you go into the bathroom, plug your USB hair dryer in, and style away, you sexy thing!

Once your hair is bulletproof, you go into the kitchen, take food out of your USB connected refrigerator (has a television in the door, by the way, because you could), cook it on your USB powered stove, and sit down at your computer. It's plugged into the wall in a USB outlet, so you don't need a router or anything for your internet connection; it's all right there. Power, network, all of it. And it's a hub for the rest of your peripherals. No, it would not be wise to power your refrigerator from your PC's USB ports. But you could set up the lava lamp.

USB; the way of the future! The whole city, state, country, world unified in one network of brotherhood, information, and power!

My Gods... it'll be beautiful.

What? It's too expensive? Oh, come on... how much could it cost... whoah... that much? Oh.

Never mind.

---

*I may be wrong about that prediction, but it's funny.

---